Perfectionist moms at greater risk for postpartum depression

An article came out yesterday on LiveScience.com reporting on a recent study that suggests perfectionism can put a new mom at risk for postpartum depression. I don't necessarily find this surprising. When I was a new mom, naturally I wanted everything to be perfect, and I totally bought into the Hallmark image of a glowing postpartum where I appeared blissful with my precious new bundles of joy while my pregnancy weight miraculously melted away.

Of course, things were far from perfect after my first pregnancy and I had absolutely no sense of control over anything that was happening. I had one baby barely hanging on in NICU, premature by three months and weighing only two pounds, and had to bury his twin brother a few days after their birth. On top of everything, only four months into my postpartum, I was stunned to find myself pregnant again.

So this article cites the study and states that: The link between perfectionism and postpartum depression was strongest amongst those who try to deal with perfectionism by appearing as if they don't have a problem.

I'm certain that I buried my depression while I was pregnant the second time around because I was terrified that the pregnancy would end up like the first. And I imagine I was still in shock from the horrible way my first pregnancy had turned out. I don't know that I was necessarily trying to deal with my perfectionism by appearing as if I wasn't suffering -- I think I was merely trying to survive an unbearable situation.

In any case, I think it's easy for new moms to fall into the perfectionism trap. Because it is definitely a trap. I've never known a mom who had it all together right after giving birth. Maybe there are some perfect moms out there, but I have yet to meet one. (Thank goodness, or that would seriously be reason to get depressed....) ;)

I think this study is interesting, although not rocket science. It would probably be worthy of being included in the "what to expect" handouts that OB's give out to prepare first-time moms. To check out the article, you can click here.

PPD's elusive symptoms

When I suffered from postpartum depression, I kept insisting that I wasn't depressed. My vision of a depressed woman consisted of lots of weeping, general moping around, hand-wringing, etc. Not a woman who was overcome by nausea 100 times worse than any morning sickness and vomiting violently when not on the toilet with diarrhea. I was a gastrointestinal specialist's fantasy. And after I was sent to a G.I. specialist, I went through the ringer: had an endoscopy, a colonoscopy, tests involving dozens of stool samples (so here I felt like total crap and got to mess with it too!), and many, many other pokes and prods. All the while, I couldn't care for my babies, couldn't even function, much less get out of bed to brush my teeth, and was hospitalized twice for several days at a time for dehydration. Three months after all this G.I. fun, my specialist threw his hands up at me, said there was no intestinal cancer, and that I should go home, get over it, enjoy my babies and have a nice life.

So here's the deal. According to the US Department of Health and Human Services, the symptoms of postpartum depression include:

- feeling restless and irritable
- feeling sad, hopeless and overwhelmed
- crying a lot
- having no energy or motivation
- eating too little or too much
- sleeping too little or too much
- trouble focusing, remembering or making decision
- feeling worthless or guilty
- withdrawal from family and friends
- loss of interest or pleasure in activities
- headaches, chest pains, heart palpitations or hyperventilation

This is a helpful list for a start, but I don't see "violent vomiting" or "intense nausea" or "fainting" or "endless diarrhea" or "dehydration" anywhere on this list. I'm sure there are plenty of other PPD symptoms that are not included as well. I've heard from new mothers who developed obsessive compulsive disorder during postpartum when they'd never experienced it before in their lives. All this leads to major confusion.....how do you even know if you have PPD? How do doctors know what to look for?? SO MANY WOMEN ARE NOT BEING DIAGNOSED!!!

Bottom line is that caregivers and family members need to be in tune to any and all disconcerting changes in a new mother and to be aware that PPD can manifest itself in myriad ways, from gastrointestinal issues to obsessive compulsive disorder, to intrusive thoughts. The key to PPD prevention and successful treatment is awareness and education. But especially awareness.....please help me spread the word.